Oh Dear God No
by Aillanna-Took
Summary: Fuujin is in trouble when her parents decide to pay her a visit. And it all started with that fateful phone-call on that fateful day in that fateful Garden, using that fateful phone...oh! um..sorry. Just read the fic! Please review!!
1. Default Chapter

"Fuujin Kazema, please report to the office. Fuujin Kazema to the office. You have a phone-call." A voice over the intercom blared; it sounded like Xu, and she sounded surprised.

As Fuujin stood up from her desk, and walked out, several of the male students whispered rude things to her. For example, "Cheatin' on Seifer, eh, Fuujin?" or, "Wow! Fuujin has a boyfriend! Or is it a girl, Fuu?" and, "Always knew she was a dyke."

Fuujin scowled, and glanced at each of the men, though, for future reference to cause them all extreme pain. Once she was out of the classroom, though, she almost ran away from the office rather than to it. The only people who would bother calling her in the middle of class were Seifer, and her mother. Since Seifer had been in class when she'd left, she knew it wasn't possibly him, and therefore, she assumed it was her mother. 

Once she reached the office, she snatched the phone from Xu's out-stretched hand. "HELLO?"

"Fuu-chan, honey!! Hello!" Fuujin winced. She recognized her mother's shrill, piercing voice immediately, and was convinced that everyone in the office could hear her.

"FINE. CLASS, MIDDLE. INTERRUPTED." Fuujin hinted, feeling the blood rush to her face.

"Oh, Fuujin, dear, I'm sure your teacher can wait for you! Such a nice young girl! What's her name again, dear? Clistus? Winston?" Judging by the look of suppressed amusement on Xu's face, Fuujin could definitely tell that her mother was heard throughout the room.

"QUISTIS." She said, resisting the desire to bang her head against a wall.

"Oh, yes! Didn't I meet her at the last PTA Meeting?" Mrs. Kazema screeched.

Flinching again, Fuujin replied, "NEGATIVE. PHONECALL, MISBEHAVIOR."

"Oh, yes! Wasn't that when you were hanging out with that awful Squall-person?" Mrs. Kazema was, of course, referring to Seifer.

"NEGAT—" Fuujin began. Then she decided to save herself the trouble and play along. "AFFIRMATIVE. EVIL, NASTY. PERSON, BAD."

"You're not talking to him anymore, are you, dear?"

"NEGATIVE, MOTHER."

"Good! Well, Fuujin dear, guess what? Your father's out of prison now, and—"

"CLASS, RETURN. MUST." Fuujin interrupted her.

"Okay, dear. I won't keep you too long. I just want to tell you that your father's out of prison, and we decided that since we're in the area, we ought to come visit you once in a while. We're coming by in a few days."

Fuujin felt the blood draining from her face. "WHAT?"

"Oh, yes! Fuujin, sweetie, we've moved in at Balamb! Now we can be closer to you _all_ the time!"

Fuujin went numb, and the phone fell with a clatter from her hand.


	2. Chapter Two

Chapter 2: Disclaimer- I forgot to add one at the beginning of the first chapter. I don't own FF8 or any of the characters. Please don't sue me. I'm broke.

When Fuujin remembered where she was, she blinked, and stooped to pick up the phone. Not bothering to say anything else to her mother, she placed it back on the receiver. She turned to leave, when Xu's voice stopped her.

"Who was that, Fuujin? Anyone of significance?" Fuujin turned, the scowl on her face growing larger and meaner with every passing second, and saw Xu standing, arms crossed and grinning madly.

"RAGE!" Fuujin immediately reentered the room, delivering a painful kick to the snobby SeeD's shin; the type normally reserved for Raijin.

Xu responded by doubling over, clinging to her leg and shouting. "Ow! Shit, Fuujin!! What the hell was that for?!"

"INSULTED. DESERVED." Fuujin allowed herself a quick smirk, which disappeared immediately (she couldn't be seen showing too much emotion after all, now could she?) before turning again, and exiting.

By the time she had left the office, class was already over, and it was close to evening, so she went directly to the cafeteria. She was, by now, weak with fear. If her mother _was_ coming to visit, her reputation would likely be forevermore ruined. In fact, there was no doubt in her mind that, by the time her mother was gone, her reputation would need serious repairs. Not to mention a large portion of Garden's students.

She entered the cafeteria and immediately went to her seat at the DC's table. Seifer and Raijin were waiting for her. "Who was that, ya know?" 

Fuujin braced herself, and quickly said, very quietly, as well, "MOTHER, MINE."

Seifer looked taken aback for a moment. "Say again?"

Fuujin growled, but complied nevertheless. "MOTHER."

Seifer laughed. "Didn't know you had parents, Fuu!" He sat back in his seat, and crossed his arms behind his head.

Fuujin growled. If Raijin had said something like that, he would be crippled for life, more than likely. Of course, Raijin _wouldn't_ say something like that, anyway. He had met Fuujin's mother.

"Oh, major bummer, ya know?!" He said sympathetically. 

"…"

"What's so bad about Fuujin's parents?" Seifer asked, sitting forward again.

"DISTURBING. STORY, LONG."

"Ya want me to tell him, Fuu?" Raijin offered.

Fuujin sighed, but nodded consent.

Raijin leaned forward, looking Seifer directly in the eyes. "Fuujin's parents are, like, worse than Selphie an' Chickenwuss an' Chickenwuss's Ma an'……uh…Chickenwuss's family...ya know….like, put together…ya know… and stuff… ya know."

Seifer, suppressing a guffaw, looked at Fuujin, who nodded solemnly, and then back to Raijin. Back and forth, between the two of them.

"Okay. So, what?"

"VISITING…. WORSE, EVEN. MOVING, BALAMB."

Raijin nearly toppled off of his chair. "Whoa! Ya gotta be kiddin', ya know?!"  
Fuujin closed her eye solemnly, and shook her head. "JOKE, NONE."

Seifer looked at Fuujin. "Are your parents really _that_ bad?"

"AFFIRMATIVE." The albino sighed. "FATHER, MINORLY SO."

"Yeah. Hey, Fuujin, isn't your dad's prison-sentence almost over, ya know?" Raijin said, slowly regaining what little he had ever had of his composure.

"AFFIRMATIVE." Fuujin nodded, looking as though she were about to cry.

…

Of course, she wouldn't. Fuujin didn't cry. She just got really mad and hurt people. However, under the circumstances, she ought to have been entirely excused for crying. For the moment, she decided to go and take her feelings out on the guys who had been saying stupid shit in class about her.

"RETURN, LATER." She said, standing and taking her leave of them.

***

Fuujin sat down on her bed, quite relieved after having taken out her wrath upon those foolish enough to cross her. They probably had yet to reach the infirmary, but that wasn't her problem now. Fuujin had a much worse problem. She had only days to plan an escape. What could she tell her parents to keep them away? She was sick and it was very, very, very, very contagious? She was under grounds-arrest* without allowance of visitors? Fuujin was racking her brain for ideas and coming up short at every attempt.

It was that moment that her roommate walked in. Fuujin scowled; she had requested a single room, but Cid said that they were reserved for SeeDs. So she got stuck sharing a room with a Trepie. She couldn't stand the prep, but any requests for a switch were either refused or ignored altogether.

"Hiya, Fuujie!" The girl shouted, loud enough to wake the dead.

Fuujin ground her teeth and stood up. "LEAVING."

She left, resisting the desire once more to hurt the girl. As she was closing the door, Emma's voice stopped her. "Fuujie! Where're ya going?"

"OUT." She said dully, shutting the door in Trepie #2's face.

The girl reminded her, a bit more than vaguely, of Selphie. Fuujin shuddered and walked rather quickly

from the dormitory. She had been looking forward to a nice, long sulk in her dorm, but that plan was spoiled, so she needed a new one for a while. She would sulk outside. Maybe she could think of a plan better outside in the gloom of twilight instead of the bright florescence of Balamb's lights.

She reached the front gates and quickly made her way out of Garden, heading for the beach on the edge of the island. She was confident she could be back before curfew.

-------------------

A/N: Wow. That took a lot longer than I thought it would. I even had to cut it short for posting due to dead-ending and writer's block. I'll write more, yes. But how long it will take? Hyne only knows. Reviews and flames are welcome. *wink wink nudge nudge* They may even inspire me to greater works. *hint hint* I plan on lengthening chapters some more eventually.


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